How do you expect…?

Expectations: When we allow our internal logic + personal experiences to shape our external relationships and interpersonal hopes.

In far too many ways, we want respect for what we expect. We expect an addict to hit rock bottom and realize it’s time to make better decisions. We expect our parents to change their views on the world when we enlighten them to ours. We expect people to fight for what they want/believe in and we expect our team members to work as hard as we do. We expect our friends that we’ve been there for to be there for us and we expect our partners to be honest and faithful when we are those things towards them. We expect our bank accounts to directly correlate to how hard we’ve worked and we expect credit to be given where credit is due. We expect everyone to understand where we’re coming from without turning blue in the face (don’t you GET it?!!!). Regardless of how it is constructed in your life, there is an illusive wall built of similar thoughts that is eager to hold you back.

In response to its presence,  some of us choose to keep running into the wall…because we’re tough and we believe it’s just another, inevitable, part of life (immune to disappointment and a lot of other things). Some of us choose to give up and accept things as they are…defeated and thinking…damn this wall…wish there was something I could do about it (content on living life, unfulfilled). Some of us can’t handle it at all and run from the challenge (removing ourselves from disappointment and unknowingly a lot of other things that life has to offer). But–there is a better way my friend…ahhhh yes…the key (as you probably expected)…is to rise above it.

Life is not withholding from you that which you deserve, or punishing you unnecessarily. Life, is trying to tell you something…are you listening? Life–is trying–to tell you something. People are not letting you down left and right…you keep setting yourself up to be let down…left and right. You are expecting the people in your life to give back in some way, shape, or form even when they’ve shown you time and time again they don’t know how or are not willing to do so. People who are empty will never fulfill you…people who cannot _________ WILL NOT _________. But the beauty of it all–is that’s OK!!!

Just let–it–be. #theBeatles #70s #sidetrack

Stop expecting the person with a flair for bad decision making, to miraculously  make good decisions when they pertain to you, SIMPLY because you are willing to comprise and sacrifice on their behalf. When it boils down to it–that is merely a bad decision on your part. Use your external observations to shape your external expectation and never just chalk something up to…”so & so being so &so” as if you are immune to the presence of their character…so & so, will be so & so, to you, eventually.

In the end, the goal is not to give everyone a free pass; the goal is to know better and to delegate your expectations appropriately. It’s almost never personal…people along the road of life simply do the best they can and know how to do at the time.

That is all. Nothing more. Nothing less.

(Newly defined) Expectations: When we allow our external observations + the let it be philosophy to shape our external relationships and interpersonal hopes.

When you have enough information on an individual or a situation, let the expectations flow; any crafted beforehand are manufactured by the ego. It is life threatening for you not to ever learn the difference.

Author: Regina Chavis

Let go and grow -- I can help!

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